What Causes Self Sabotage Behaviour?

Posted by Paul Whalland on

Self sabotage is when we knowingly take actions consciously to prevent ourselves from reaching our goals. This can effect our relationships, our career as well as personal goals such as weight loss. This behaviour can be all consuming from the very first moment we wake up right up to when we fall asleep.

But what really does cause self sabotage?

The answer can be many, but in the end it can come down to what we really think about ourselves. This mostly comes down to a lack of self belief in oneself. So what causes a lack of self belief?


Learn to identify your negativity and what triggers it. This way you can take action before it takes hold and consumes your thoughts and actions. The thing is if you can identify it straight away, you can defuse it at that moment, so it cannot take over your thoughts and control you. This can open up positive thoughts and change your mood for the rest of the day.

Identify and celebrate the positive about yourself. This could be so many things from past achievements and what drove you and just how good it made you feel about yourself. Remember that past achievements can help you achieve present day goals simply because you know when you had that self belief and desire, you can climb mountains. 

 When you take in positive thoughts start using those positive thoughts again and again to smother the negative ones before they take hold.

Give yourself a break to self reflect on all the positive things about yourself and all the good things you experienced in the past, but more importantly the good things you will experience in the future by taking that first step into self belief.

Learn to become more assertive and confident in knowing you can achieve your goals even when negative influences present themselves (you are a lot stronger than you think). 

Every goal has it challenges, and there can be many. Learn to take on each challenge one at a time so as not to overwhelm yourself. Remember, Rome was not built in one day, just like your goal will not be achieved in one day. Take one day at a time and don’t let setbacks take control, but learn from those setbacks, and you will identify them quickly and avoid them next time. But most importantly embrace them simply because you have learned from them.

Take time to celebrate small goals that you have achieved along the way. Lots of small goals achieved no matter how long your journey is, will amount to big achievements at your journeys end.


  • Negative influences are not going to consume my thoughts and actions.
  • I am a positive person that has achieved positive things before.
  • Nothing is going to stop me achieving what I want today or the next.
  • Being positive about myself will see myself overcome negative thoughts and actions.
  • I will take time everyday to reflect on all the positive things in my life that have changed me for the better and that make me happy.
  • I am growing more confident everyday because deep down i know i can achieve great things.
  • I will take on challenges that may have stopped me in the past, but more importantly learn from my set backs to keep moving forward and achieving my goals. 

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